During this fasting month, I left the office early (with approval off course) for home. I then picked up my children and drove straight home. Because I was early, I managed to save a lot of time on the road. Normally I would cook something for the family, sometimes more dish, sometimes less, sometimes none, for the fasting break time. Then after that I will spend the time in the family area minding the kids in front of the TV.
I have to mention my kids here. Emir speech is even more now even though it’s still painfully difficult to understand 100% of what he’s saying. And he’s getting so active being superman, batman, ultraman or whatever man there is in this universe. I worry some times that he may hurt himself. He seems so playful and full with energy. Never walking, always running and speeding here and there, otherwise rolling up and down or flying up and away. Huh, such energy! He also teased his sister and his mommy. Pandai betul…He’s such a pleasure to watch. He makes my heart swell.
And Fatini currently she has to practice reading a passage of a story as homework. She does not read yet. I wonder if other kids her age already advanced in reading. I’m supposed to teach her but I don’t possess the patience required as teacher so most of the time I asked her to read by herself. How is she going to learn then having a mother like that? Well I am not too worried about it actually. I hope she will read soon. (Just hoping but didn’t do anything!) Apart from that her activity will include teasing her brother and doing her other ‘work’ quietly. Well, just in case Fatini is reading this in the future, I love to look at you as well darling. You are a pleasure for me to have.
And me…. what do I do during this month? I know it should be different from other months but yet there was I still spending time watching the TV at night (terrible!), winding down from work, and then come 11 pm unable to keep my eyes open anymore. I only went to the Tarawih congregation once on the eve of the first Ramadhan. I should be doing more to improve my spiritual side this month. Somehow the time is too tight for me or maybe it’s just my excuses. But I hate the rush. I have to think of alternatives.
Well, to remind myself as well, this is a month to purify the soul, a month to teach our inner self to be more humble and grateful, and a month to serve and get closer to God better. I am just a normal human being trying my best to do the best I can. And God is so ever the most Gracious the most Merciful. And I hope to be a better person as each day comes.
